I'm sorry I haven't posted in awhile. There hasn't been much to report. My friend finally did have her baby after 51 hours. Wow! Impressive.
It was hard but I was happy. Another friend also had her babies as well. I had decided when she asked me how I was doing I would say,
"It is well." I keep thinking It is well with in my soul. It's from 2nd Kings Chapter 4. There was a Shunammite woman who would often prepare her house for a Elisha the traveling prophet, anytime he passed by her house. He stopped so often that she even set about putting a room together just for him with a bed and a lamp. When he asked her if there was anything he could do for her she replied with "I have a home among my people." Almost as if to say, she didn't need anything. The story speaks to me on many levels, but if you are not familiar with this story, then the point I would like to highlight is that the woman had no children.
When Elisha asked his servant what could be done for the woman for showing such hospitality yet she would take nothing, the servant responded that she has no son and her husband was very old. While I do not know if she had daughters, the bible doesn't specifically say one way or the other. To my knowledge, but I'm still learning. When Elisha called her back he said "This time next year, you will hold a son in your arms."
She was surprised but yet from her next sentence we know she's really telling him "don't get my hopes up" as she said basically "Please don't tell me this if it's not true."
2 Kings 4:17 tells of her becoming pregnant and giving birth to a son at the time that Elisha had said she would.
Sometime later as the boy is growing he complains to his father that he has a headache. After going back to the house, and lying in his mothers arms the boy dies. She tells her husband to snag one of his servants and set her up to go see the prophet Elisha. He questions her why this time of year, she simply says "that it's fine". It doesn't matter. I can go see him whenever I want. There's no time limit on God or his prophets.
As she was coming closer to where the prophet Elisha was staying, he saw her carriage approaching and he sent a servant out to greet them. (You know, these people have a lot of servants. I used to think it would be cool once to have servants...but really who has time for servants?) When Elisha's servant approaches the carriage he too begins to question her "Is Everything alright? Is someone sick?"
She replies (KJV) 2nd Kings 4:26 "It Is Well."
This woman knew that Elisha could preform miracles. And as surely as the God who had brought her this child when she was least expecting it, she knew he would bless her again. She didn't complain to the messenger or try to explain but she was going straight to the guy in charge to help her.
Verse 28 when she finally approaches Elisha she says "Did I ask you for a son my Lord? Didn't I tell you not to get my hopes up?"
She told Elisha, that she would not leave his side until he came back with her. Almost as if clinging to God when she needed it most. God, I will not try to use your tools to fix my distress. I will be with you every step of the way until you come back to what I need you for. Knowing, trusting, believing.
I'm not sure where you are in your infertility journey. My heart breaks that you have to walk this journey. In some ways I feel as if I've just begun my journey and in other ways I know that after almost 5 years of waiting, I'm tired.
I'm tired and sad. I still went to go see those babies. I still was very happy for them. I rejoiced when they needed me to rejoice, but then I took that moment in the bathroom on Monday night and cried. There was no one around expect God.
I believe that It Is Well. That my season of waiting is almost over. I can feel it in my soul. But whether it's another year or another two years has yet to be determined. I will do my best to stick by God until he comes back around to my heartbreak. I know that God can fix this. He will fix this. I have to learn to wait with him and not just on him.
The woman, who was never named, to my knowledge. Elisha brought her son back to her. The boy lived.
Isn't our God amazing?
Waiting is hard. Waiting with God we can take comfort in knowing that "It Is Well."